When "Uplifting" lets you down

by Jessica Martin-Weber

"We need to be relevant." I hear that a lot when I meet with pastors, youth pastors, and some church leaders. It usually comes from those advocating change in a transitioning church and I've found that it usually means "uplifting contemporary worship." But in their quest to be "relevant" in how they worship and share the gospel many church leaders loose touch with the culture of their congregation as well as the culture they are trying to reach and as a result somehow end up "irrelevant" in a new style.

“Happy, clappy music” and SNL style dramas don’t make a church relevant, nor do small groups. I’m not saying they’re bad (though the music and dramas are certainly not my style) but that it’s more than the programs and worship style that connects people with Christ. Though the term “authentic” is over-used when it comes to talking about worship these days, true authenticity seems to be lacking in most of our churches. When I asked a friend of mine what would make a church relevant to him he said “honesty.” A place where pretence is set aside and we can be who we are without having to have all the answers. A place where we can share honestly about Scripture, relationships, serving, and life’s struggles as well as express praise and celebration. Such a place would be more relevant than all the video clips, small group book discussions, and trendy music you could find. Community is a beautiful thing but community that neglects the harder side of life isn’t really a community, it’s a country club. Constantly being “up” can be tough to live up to and not at all what we see in the struggles found in Scripture. Sure, there are groups that are willing to discuss some of life’s struggles (usually men’s groups and women’s groups) but we don’t usually find this happening in our worship gatherings, at least not outside of the occasional sermon that is willing to wrestle with “the dark side.” Most leaders understand that praise and worship isn’t based on our feelings, but somehow we have managed to communicate just the opposite by only planning high energy praise portions in our services that express constant “up” feelings as in some unnatural high followed by mellow Jesus love songs the have no problem with feigning intimacy without embracing the tension of hurt unsettled that is actually a part of such relationships. I have no doubt that some people really don’t want to deal with the part of themselves that is a "downer” and leaders want worshipers to leave “uplifted” but nowhere do we see in Scripture where denial is accepted (think David, Bathsheba and Nathanial) but growth, with all it’s painful qualities, is embraced and encouraged.

Is relevancy even something we should be seeking? I question the importance of being relevant because I'm struck by the timelessness of the Gospel. Often we hope that we will be relevant by using what are really languages of the culture and certainly these tools help in communicating the Gospel but they don't make us relevant. True relevancy comes from honest living, honest teaching, honest questions and honest worship. We don’t have to do anything to make the message we share relevant, God has already done that. The most we can hope for is to live the Gospel with relevance in our own lives, through the highs and the lows.